27-year-old woman refuses to leave family holiday early with her boyfriend after he claims he's not having fun, he stops talking to her in response: ‘You shouldn't have stayed’

Author image for Bar Mor Hazut
Bar Mor Hazut • Senior Editor
Oct 26, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

Being in a long-term committed relationship means that sometimes you have to partake in activities you are not excited about. Whether it is a family gathering, friends' hangouts, or even doctor appointments, being there with your partner is a non-negotiable element of the relationship.

When the boyfriend in the story below asked to join his girlfriend on her family vacation, it seemed like a good sign. Here he was, asking to take part in an activity that could be alarming to some. However, after five days out of the intense two-week vacation, the boyfriend felt like he had had enough and told his girlfriend he wanted to leave. She understood, and even her family supported his decision.

The next morning, she drove him to the bus stop so he could return home, but he was surprised that she was not going back with him. Why would she stay at her family vacation when he wanted to leave?

And when she returned from the holiday, he refused to speak to her…

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  • It seems like the boyfriend is not ready for a committed relationship. The question is, should the girlfriend give him another chance, or break up before it's too late?

  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 10567241472
    via South_agency

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02

    AITA for staying at the family holiday instead of leaving when my boyfriend left?

    I (27F) took my boyfriend of a year and a half (27M) on my annual family trip to my Grandparents Cabin.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 03
    We've been doing this my entire life, for two weeks we go up there and fish, hike, hunt, forage and basically unplug from our lives back home.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 04
    I love it and it's the highlight of my year. My Boyfriend expressed interest in going with me this year as he'd not be able to see or talk to me during those two weeks, we'd been dating last year when I went on this but not long enough for me to consider inviting him along.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 05
    I won't lie, I was hesitant to agree. I warned him what it involves. That there is no TV, No Wifi, hell you can rarely get a signal for your phone out there.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 06
    I told him if he came he'd have to bring books or something to occupy himself with in case he didn't want to do the activity of the day.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 07
    He told me he'd be fine and I took him at his word. The whole family was happy to have him there, my grandparents, parents, my brothers, their partners and kids.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 08
    Even my aunt and cousins popped round for part of the trip. I had pushed aside my anxiety over him coming and was excited for him to see this part of my life.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 09
    He did try to enjoy it but it was clear he was miserable. The only thing he liked was swimming and most days the water was too cold to do that for long.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 10
    After five days he told me he wanted to go home and I respected that, hell the rest of my family let him know he'd done well and there was no hard feelings.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 11
    Cheezburger Image 10567241216
    via Askar Abayev

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 12
    I drove him to the bus stop in the nearest town and told him i'd wait with him till the bus came.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 13
    He was confused about this he seemed to assume i'd be going back with him and I explained that no I wasn't that i'd see him. when I got home and we'd do something he'd enjoy.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 14
    He seemed a bit sullen but at the time I put that down to perhaps he was embarrassed he was dipping.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 15
    When I got home yesterday I reached out to him and my calls were ignored, I thought something was wrong so I drove to his and when he answered the door he told me he was upset i'd let him go home alone and that as his girlfriend I should have came back with him.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 16
    I was startled by this and asked why i'd come home when he knows I look forward to this every year?
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 17
    He told me it was the principle of the thing that I shouldn't have stayed when he didn't, then asked me if we got married oneday would I keep doing this and leaving him behind when he doesn't like it?
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 18
    I told him I didn't get what the big deal was that it was ok we didn't like all the same things but he doesn't seem to feel that way.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 19
    I don't know, I just feel conflicted. Was it really that big a deal for me to stay when he left?
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 20
    Globaller You're definitely NTA. It's a strike against him to expect you to have left with him and to be р y towards you about it. You gave him a chance to join a family trip and he wanted to bail. You guys were nice about his departure so you and your family were doing everything right.
    via Globaller
  • 21
    OP CabinHolidayHunter Thank you! My family and I know it's not for everyone. Hell my brothers partner of five years struggled at first with it and slowly built herself up to the two weeks so we understand not everyone can manage it right out of the gate.
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 22
    Useful_Language2040 Did he ask you if you minded leaving early when he said he wanted to leave, and suggest doing something else together with your time off? Did he not notice you weren't packing and didn't have your stuff in the car when he put his stuff in it? No? Then why on earth would he have thought that you'd be leaving a trip you really enjoy and had been looking forward to all year? Also, did he pack books for the downtime? Did he come properly prepared for the activities (e.g. appropri
    via Useful_Language2040
  • 23
    OP Cabin HolidayHunter No he didn't pack any books for downtime I didn't realise till we were there I figured if he didn't bring books maybe he'd bring his switch lite as it's a decent portable gaming device but he didn't even bring that. He was then bored stiff when the evenings were mostly just chatting, enjoying drinks by the fire and board games. I DID however make sure he had appropriate clothing, shoes and a rucksack I knew he'd have none of it so when he made it clear he wanted to come I
    via CabinHolidayHunter
  • 24
    NTA plm56 So he: Couldn't handle being unplugged for one week, let alone two Pouted when you didn't leave with him Ignored your calls when you came home Expects you to stay home and hold his widdle hand if you get married Big red flags. Tell him you will 100% continue going to these retreats when you are married, and if he's not mature enough to deal with that, it's probably best to cut your losses. Differing interests are healthy, as long as both parties are mature and secure enough to accept i
    via plm56
  • 25
    curiousr_nd_curiousr He raises a good point OP - if this relationship continues, do you want a partner who doesn't want to be part of this family tradition, or who would try to prevent your participation? NTA
    via curiousr_nd_curiousr
  • 26
    notastraycat NTA, and now you know something important. He only cares about what he wants.
    via notastraycat
  • 27
    Humble-Macaron7768 NTA. And this is your first sign to cut ties now. What future do you see with him? If he doesn't like something you can't do it? Your kids don't get to enjoy your family trips and traditions? He doesn't need to like it, but he won't let you enjoy it, like you're entitled to enjoy things with him.
    via Humble-Macaron7768
  • 28
    Ok_Stable7501 Did you try unplugging the boyfriend and plugging him back in? Maybe his attitude will improve after a hard reset. NTA
    via Ok_Stable7501
  • 29
    imalovernotaspider I'd think long and hard about continuing this relationship.
    via imalovernotaspider

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